Monday, August 17, 2009

"God as my witness, I will quit if this is not fixed!"

This morning, I rolled into the school parking lot at 8:48, with a healthy twelve minutes to spare before class. Plenty of time to leisurely start up my computer, eat some of Liz's healthy cupcakes and Anna's cocoa roasted almonds she brought for me (SERIOUSLY. GO BUY THEM NOW. SAM'S CLUB). However, little did I know that a cruel twist of fate meant that four things were going to put a stop to my morning schedule:

  • a) The undergraduates at USA started school today.
  • b) Last year, the university constructed a ginormous Health Sciences building that is located right next to our Medical School building.
  • c) In the process of constructing this building, not only did they create a need for about eight thousand new parking spaces, but they actually REMOVED some of the parking spaces that were already in place for the medical students.
  • d) Undergrad classes start at 8. First year medical classes start at 8:30. Second year classes start at 9.

As a result, there was literally not a single parking space to be found in the entire complex surrounding our school building. After circling around for ten minutes or so, I found out that we were expected to park at the Student Health building. This is not even close. It's at least a 10-15 minute walk. And there is not even a sidewalk to get there -- you have to trudge through sand and grass and construction dirt for a good chunk of the way.

Instead of venting my frustrations, I would like to invite the rest of you who find yourself with similar amounts of bottled-up anger to consider when this happened to the good people of Dunder Mifflin Paper Company. Due to construction happening at W.B. Jones, their parking spaces were all taken up and they had to park down the street.

They didn't take it well either. Oscar struggles with seniority, while Andy has footwear issues:

"I've been here nine years, now all of a sudden I'm supposed to park half a mile away?"
"I lost a penny out of my loafers, Oscar."

Jim and Pam, meanwhile, have plenty of time to enjoy the wonders of the natural world.
"Tell them what we saw today, Jim."
"Today we saw a junkyard dog attacking the bones of a rotisserie chicken."

But friends, let us not be discouraged by this minor setback. If paper salesmen can solve the problem, so can medical students. Let us all look to Andrew Bernard as our guide as we work towards our goal.

"Did I do this for me? No. I did this, for the little guy. For Joe six pack. The guy who wakes up every morning in his four hundred dollar a month apartment, wonders how he's gonna pay his mortgage that month. Wonders how he's gonna fill his car up with oil. Wonders, how am I gonna pay my kids' orphanage bills. That guy shouldn't have to wonder where he's gonna park."

1 comment:

Debbie said...

I bet you are wishing you still lived across the street from school! (Except for the nasty apartment issue.)